The Conversation

INVARIABLY the New Family parents knew it would come to this. They would disagree and even argue about how to raise the twins, a classic conflict of values. These arise no matter how homogenous or diverse two new parents are. The New Family parents had their first disagreement tonight.

The issue is simple enough to explain, though the background could take several paragraphs. The material facts are that Mom wants to bathe the kids, currently at about four weeks, while Dad wants to defer.

Retracing the debate, Mom’s argument cited the benefits of bathing, supported both by current literature and professional opinion. She identified the risks and presented evidence of how she would negate them.

Dad, citing the same sources, argued that a full bath was unnecessary. Cleaning them with damp cloths and store bought baby wipes would be sufficient.

Mom pressed her point and added that wipes would be insufficient and that germs find the current environment ideal for multiplication.

Dad followed up by expressing his concern about the delicacy of their skin and the unpleasant temperatures they would endure for the bath.

Mom countered that such conditions could be mitigated by certain techniques designed to enhance the twin’s comfort.

Dad reiterated his first argument emphasizing that sanitation was achievable without a full bath, plus the twins’ aggravation would not be an issue with the wipes. Mom’s long pause led him to believe that the argument was settled in his favor. His experience told him that reason had triumphed.

After a period of silence, resting her nose on the top of her son's head, holding him tightly in her bosom, her head half turned toward Dad and using the gentle glow of the incandescent back light to her advantage, she smiled widely and simply pleaded, “Their heads don’t smell new anymore.”

The children are scheduled for their first bath tomorrow morning.

Asymmetric conflict does not always reward the most prepared opponent.