OH, the political rhetoric is heating up this evening as we are just three days away from Election Eve. Tonight, the MacLaughing Group hosts the final debate between supporters of Governor Pizza and incumbent President Hotdog.
EJ; "I vote for Pizza!"
 |
Votes for Pizza |
Liesel; "I vote for Hotdog!"
 |
Votes for Hotdog |
Liesel; "Pizza will take away your milk and substitute
Tea!"
EJ; "We can't tolerate four more years of Hotdog!"
Liesel; “Hotdog inherited the mess Pizza people made. He
needs another term to clean it up.”
 |
Pizza party mess is a two term job |
EJ; “ ‘Hotdog inherited’? Hotdog ran for the job! Ask yourself this, is there
more food on your face today than there was four years ago?”
Liesel; “Like Vice President Bun said, ‘Under Hotdog, mustard
is alive and ketchup is dead.’ Pizza has run negative attack ads against
Hotdog. Do you want a leader that has to campaign negatively to scare voters
into supporting him? Hotdog ran on the positive platform of 'Expect Change'."
 |
Mustard alive, Ketchup dead. The true CHICAGO dog |
EJ; " ‘Expect Change’ metastasized into more of the same, only
worse. Pizza's experience and
acumen will lead us to
satisfied tummies!"
Liesel; “Governor Pizza supported Hotdog’s policies before
he was against them; he flips faster than a hamburger on a hot grill.”
 |
Governor Pizza flipped positions |
EJ; “Pizza runs on his record, Hotdog runs from his record.”
Liesel; “Hotdog supports condiment choice. Pizza is against
relish marriage.”
EJ; "Hotdog supporters are crazy."
 |
Moonbats |
Liesel; "Don't go
ad hominem on me you greasy fingered
Pizza lover!"
(In unison); "Daaaaad!"
New Family Dad; "You are both having bottles for lunch
today."
New Family Dad; "And that concludes our roundtable discussion tonight. Join us next week when our guests debate the results of the election and the message each party should infer from it. "