The New Family

Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Movin' on Up

BUDDY put his new climbing skills to use. Dad moved the step stool out of the way and without thought, placed it next to the couch. He then disappeared and returned shortly thereafter to find EJ sitting on the couch. So he put him on the floor and watched.


EJ moved quickly to regain his former situation.


Up he goes. Buggy watched, and learned. Remember Buddy, maintain three points of contact at all times (hand, hand, foot, or foot, foot, hand)!



Here he crosses a major hurdle, the gap between the stool and the couch. Later he will attempt a third try and get caught in between.


Made it to safety.


Unsatisfied to merely sit and enjoy his previous accomplishment, he moves even higher.


But finds the leather too slippery to go further.


Trying again, the wet wipe box captures his attention.


Having not retrieved it, he then moves laterally to explore the contents of the side table.


Everything must come off!



Don't lean backward Buddy.




He's going after the explorer's cap next.


Not every attempt to climb up was successful. Below, he got trapped in the gap.


Try again next time Buddy.

Buggy carefully watched her brother and attempted it herself. She lacks the coordination he has so her attempt was unsuccessful. But she'll get there.

As soon as the weather is warm enough, Dad'll have to get him out to the park to climb the playground equipment.

Update: Why Dad is comfortable with this, but Mom is not.

Life involves risk. Every risk has a potential benefit and cost. We work to maximize the benefits of a given decision while mitigating the risks. We also assess the risk/benefit ratio and select certain courses of action while foregoing others.

Staying in bed all day seems like a lesser risk than commuting to work. But most of us accept the risk of having an accident on the way to work in order to get the benefit of an income. Plus, staying in bed carriers its own risks, though not frequently recognized. While remote, a sink hole could open up beneath the house and swallow us whole. So we maximize the benefit (employment that suits our needs) while minimizing the risks (driving a vehicle with 100 airbags).

The factors Dad assessed before allowing this activity we're the potential for harm, a fall onto a hard surface resulting in a head injury or lesser bumps and bruises. Dad considered EJ's innate abilities for climbing, for example he clings very tightly when elevated, he has a rational fear of heights, he tends to tuck and roll when he falls, and he does not like falling down. These mitigate the risk sufficient for Dad's comfort.

The benefits are obvious. EJ learns to coordinate his movements to overcome physical obstacles. He fine tunes his sense of balance. He learns what objects are stable enough to climb and which to avoid.

Further, Dad believes the Twins are naturally going to try climbing so rather than try to stop it, Dad makes it as safe as possible without removing all possible danger. He stays close, but doesn't interfere if a non-injurious fall occurs.

Mom would prefer they not climb. The benefits do not exceed the risks in her mind. They are her little babies that she has invested so much time, energy and emotion into. She foresees them tumbling to their imminent doom. She prefers her investments be safe and secure.

Dad is okay with that.

Children benefit from having two parents with two different perspectives. They will learn different skills from both. Mom will teach them to always be safe and secure. Dad'll teach them to conquer the world. And, as a result, they'll turn out to be healthy, well adjusted human beings able to weigh the risks and benefits of a particular decision for themselves and pursue an informed course of action.

Saturday, April 20, 2013

Superhero

MOVE over Wonder Woman, there is a new superhero in town!
Buggy Girl contemplates her next move.

Little Monkeyboy Climbs a Basket

EJ decided put his climbing skills to test.

 Up he goes. Steady, steady!

 And he's up!

 And he's back down. But he doesn't cry out for Dad.

 Undaunted, he tries gain. Good boy Buddy!

Here is another series.

"Snack time EJ. Why don't you climb on up into your high chair?"

 "Already there Dad!"



 "I can't quite reach it. A little help Dad?"

Time for Puffs

3:00 is snack time, and the hungry New Family children like to feed themselves their various puffed oat, wheat, and rice snacks.



They get as many of them stuck to their backsides as they get into their tummies. 

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Let's Talk

EJ is really trying to learn to talk. During snack time today he put aside his usual syllable babble da-da-da-da, and tried instead an interjectory da-da! Having gotten Dad's full attention, EJ had used his outdoor voice after all, he then waited and studied Dad's face for a response.

Dad looked at his son expecting to exchange a quick smile and to see EJ demure as is his pattern, but got a little creeped out when his smile was met with a laser like stare in response.

There was no warmth, no emotion at all, just cold eyes fixed on Dad's face, acutely observing his reaction which, for the briefest of moments, bordered on terror.

Dad felt that the da-da was an accusation made by a confident prosecutor having built a solid case against a defendant.

Dad, disconcerted, broke the gaze and turned aside going back to preparing snacks, when EJ again shouted da-da! Dad again looked at EJ, this time offering no smile.

He stared. EJ stared back. Microseconds that felt like minutes passed.

Dad's mind raced through scenarios searching for an appropriate rebuttal, most of which you have seen before in psycho-thriller movies. He finally settled on one. He nervously offered his son an oat puff. Suddenly EJ was his normal self again and now focused on the joy of eating.

Dad felt relieved, odd since he had done nothing wrong, been accused of nothing, but had only come under the curious gaze of his son.

Dad later figured out what it was that unnerved him. It was the realization that the Twins were entering a new phase of development where they would soon be more than just observing and learning the New Parent's behaviors, but they would also soon be mimicking them. EJ's newest attempt at puzzling out language made Dad keenly aware that son was becoming aware, aware enough that Dad had to consider his own role modeling the Twins would soon be emulating the worst if not best of .

All of them. Including Dad's favorite abuse of language, one he seems to favor when he encounters unexpected frustration.

That is terrifying.

Why Dad felt accused of modeling poo

A Dreary, Rainy Day


WHAT is with this recent weather?

It has been rainy, drizzling, and overcast for several days in a row here in Suburban Chicago. Dad and the Twins want to get out for a walk, but until things clear up, and dry up, they're stuck indoors.

A happy Buggy in the play space.
Don't let the flash fool you. It is dark.

Buddy is not so happy about it.
 Maybe he has SAD?

She is ready to come out and explore.

Gotta get the obligatory explorers cap on.

And now we're out!
 "Hmm," Dad thinks, "It stinks around here."

"Wasn't me Dad!"
 And indeed it was not.

Wardrobe change.
 And the skies lightened some, but did not clear.

EJ finds his jumper a nice place to be.

So nice in fact, he is getting drowsy.

She is not ready for a nap yet.
Flooding rain expected in SuburbanLand in the next 36 hours. Even the ducks took shelter on the roof of a neighboring house.



If you see some guy building an Ark, maybe you should seek passage.

Monday, April 15, 2013

Playtime Together

GIVEN the option, the Twins usually stay together. If one heads off down a hall (usually her) the other will soon follow. Today was no different.

Catching up with his sister.



They frequently check to see where the other one is.



Separation never lasts for long.


Their need is to be in close proximity, they do not necessarily need to interact though they frequently do.

Buddy Too

EJ waits patiently for breakfast (yogurt, mixed berries, and oats).

Handsome

Adorable

Earnest


Impatient

Normally he would have some toasted oats cereal to feed himself while Dad prepares breakfast, but today he had to endure the wait 'cause Dad wanted pictures.